Wendy here: This is kind of scary to be honest. Welcome. To another episode of wild and precious conversations.
An edited, abridged version of the podcast/video cast :) Yes, if you would like to actually look at someone very, very real, I uploaded this to YouTube.
But let’s start with that quote, that's often miss attributed to Voltaire.
“I disagree wholeheartedly with what you say, but I will defend to my death, your right to say it.”
And I realized that there's a lot in that quote. First of all, let me defend to my death. My God.
But also just that holding tight to yeah. Let's Lean in. That turn of phrase has gotten so. Co-opted and misused, but let's literally lean in to our friends and our enemies and our acquaintances. And when they say something that really tweaks or shows up as irritation or whatever.
I would put forward that an appropriate human response.
Is to listen.
And learn.
As we sit in this really warm, nurturing compost, and yes, that's a euphemism. For the. S H I T that life sometimes hands us.
When we're sitting in that. Nurturing pile of shit. With another human. You know, Think about the growth.
Are you with me?
So I was contemplating that a lot.
And I woke up.
to a lovely quote By Martin Luther king Jr.
In the Riverside Church Speech he said something that hit me.
"I am convinced that if we are to get on the right side of the world revolution, we as a nation must undergo a radical revolution of values. We must rapidly begin the shift from a "thing-oriented" society to a "person-oriented" society. When machines and computers, profit motives and property rights are considered more important than people, the giant triplets of racism, materialism, and militarism are incapable of being conquered."
I honestly, when I woke up to that,
I just thought, well, there you go.
I do believe though that what is happening is that we're just simply out of practice. Out of practice with simply being human.
****
But if our thoughts and prayers, don't also include going into the trenches with our friends and enemies, sitting quietly with them.
Listening to them learning what they need and what is not being heard. Then we are failing. The secular humanists among us I imagine, know this well. ***
I'd like to now ask it here to consider your day.
And consider.
What percentage of your day is spent doing things that humans do?
Comforting each other and yourself encouraging. Wandering in nature, caring for each other. Mending creating, growing. What percentage of your day is spent outdoors or natural light? What percentage of your day spent calmly, quietly listening to another human. Not trying to convince another human of something.
Not trying to coerce or persuade.
Not talking about superficial stuff only.
How much of your day is spent in natural surroundings.
What time, what percentage of your day is spent playing music?
I could go on.
***
I don't really care. How your life. Appears to be.
I really do care.
How real it is.
One of my very favorite books of all time is the Velveteen rabbit. The subtitle for that book is how toys become real. It's a book that honestly brings me to tears.
I'm going to paraphrase the book and it may have gotten a little wrong. This is my memory. It's the story of a young boy. You ended up with Scarlet fever and who loved his stuffed rabbit fairy. Very much. He loved it so much. They didn't ended up with a little missing fur, and I believe its button eye was loosened, maybe missing.
It's exactly. I think really, you know, kind of what we mean when we say something's well loved.
In the end when the boy’s belongings needed to be burned because this book was written quite a long time ago. To make sure that the Scarlet fever was completely gone. His dear stuffed rabbit ended up coming to life and joining the other rabbits in the garden.
You really should read the book.
I realized though. I think that that's what I'm doing is trying to move awkwardly, moving toward a life that is becoming real.
And that, you know, I'm just going to say it here now, sometimes that can be a little lonely.
But I find that I'm naturally gravitating toward people. Who are also wanting to become real.
And I'm noticing a joy. In the mutual recognition.
When we both kind of go, oh, “You too? Come on, let's go”.
When I began this project. A little over two years ago.
I only knew that I wanted to begin to use my writing, my passion for mental health and my hobby for programming.
To a purpose driven end. It's all I knew.
And. Completely organic heart - driven way. Until two and a couple months in. Here I am.
And I'm noticing that as my life awkwardly and sometimes painfully blossoms. I understand. This project is about becoming real.
It's about making peace with myself and asking others to make peace with themselves. It's about training. To become freer, less obedient to the world, too. Less obedient to a “thing oriented society.” More joyful.
I'm at a point where I'd really like to invite you in.
I feel ready. My weekly newsletters sets you up for a week of inquiry and practice and no. You won't become more productive. You won't become richer.
You won't gain any fashion sense.
You might though become real.
Notes:
Velveteen Rabbit
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Wendy Talks About Becoming Real